Not A Moron
Prove you're actually alive by successfully starting the game.
To War!
Complete Basic Training.
Down And Dirty
Complete Mission 1.
A Jolly Jaunt
Complete Mission 2.
Who You Gonna Call?
Complete Mission 3.
Clowning Around
Complete Mission 4.
Ashes To Ashes
Complete Mission 5.
God Is On Your Side...
Complete Mission 6.
...Just Kidding! He’s Not
Complete Mission 7.
Inner Demons
Complete Mission 8.
Murder the Magnate
Complete Mission 9.
Trench Foot
Complete Mission 1, Badass difficulty.
Master Of My Own Fete
Complete Mission 2, Badass difficulty.
A Ghost Of A Chance
Complete Mission 3, Badass difficulty.
Crashing The Castle
Complete Mission 4, Badass difficulty.
A Grave Mistake
Complete Mission 5, Badass difficulty.
Heil Mary, Full Of Grace
Complete Mission 6, Badass difficulty.
You're Locked In Here With Me!
Complete Mission 7, Badass difficulty.
Hello Darkness, My Old Friend
Complete Mission 8, Badass difficulty.
Ozymandias
Complete Mission 9, Badass difficulty.
To Be Continued...
Complete Call of Judy.
Or Was It Judith?
Complete Call of Judy, Badass difficulty.
Slayer Of Sponge
Destroy a totally innocent cake.
Decturion
Deliver the sweet release of death to ten totally justifiable targets.
Centurion.
Deliver the sweet release of death to one hundred somewhat justifiable targets.
Milturion.
Deliver the sweet release of death to one thousand definitely unjustifiable targets.
Splash!
Kill at least 3 enemies with one grenade or rocket explosion.
KABOOM!
Blow up.
Get Mounted
Complete your first mounted gun section.
Hole Puncher
Complete every mounted gun section to become the ultimate Stationary Killer.
Do You Know Who I Am?
Listen to an entire Kenneth Announcement.
Baptised
Sponge. That. Sinner!
Live Dangerously
Ride the Ferris Wheel.
Useless Information...
Find your first piece of Intel.
...Or Surprising Insights?
Find every piece of Intel in Call of Judy.
Ice Cold
Destroy every ice cream van.
Duck, Duck, Mousse
Run over all the innocents on the Ghost Train.
Lingerer
Listen to every tannoy announcement at the Fete.
I Need No Announcement
Destroy every tannoy at the Fete.
Thus Spake Kenneth
Listen to every tannoy announcement in the evening-time at the Fete.
He Shoots, He Scores!
Improve your K:D by killing three enemies with 1 bullet.
The Gospel According To Murdoch
Listen to all tannoy announcements in the Musoleum.
Silence Is Golden
Destroy all the tannoys in Musoleum.
Nothing To Hide
Investigate the Surveillance system.
Piece Of Pie
Discover the "legitimate" sources of the Bum.
Patience Of A Saint
Satisfy your OCD in the Filing room.
Sunday Schooling
Kill 666 Nuns on the Sabbath.
A Single Kenneth Suddenly Silenced
Destroy every tannoy in the evening-time at the Fete.
We’ve Been Here Before…
Play every different level in Call of Judy, then start any one level again.
PC Master Race
Complete any mission in Call of Judy with keyboard and mouse.
Pure-Bred Console Player
Complete any mission in Call of Judy with a controller.
Oh Boy, A Friend!
Play split-screen.
Sorry, No Refunds
Collateral Damage
Told You So
Tomb Raider
The Church's Dirty Little Secret
Future Shock One
These Aren't Just Zombies...These Are NotZombies
What Is Dead May Never Die
If You Want Something Done Right…
There But For The Grace Of God…
Joseph's Favourite Son
Feelin' Lucky, Punk?
Gazzer's Revenge
Open Wide
Offshore Account
Well I’ll Be Damned
0WN3D
PWN3D
The People's Republic Of NotGames
Complete any Mission in Call of Judy while censorship is in effect.
NotBad
Complete Call of Judy, Gamer difficulty.
Doing What's Necessary
Put Denis Down.