Got a Car and a Date
Complete "Welcome to the Age of Metal"
Start a Revolution
Complete "Exploited in the Bowels of Hell"
Thick as a Baby's Arm
Complete "Lair of the Metal Queen"
Hair Remover
Complete "Battle for Bladehenge"
French Kiss Instructor
Complete "Pilgrimage of Screams"
Chicks n' Booze n' Stuff
Complete "Sanctuary of Sin"
Ran to the Hills
Complete "It's Raining Death"
Fistful of Fog
Complete "Dry Ice, Wet Graves"
No More Tears
Complete "Sea of Black Tears"
Overkill
Complete all hunting secondary missions
Squeal Like a Chicken
Complete all racing secondary missions
Protector
Complete 20 ambush, outpost defense, or mortar secondary missions
Metal God
Achieve 100% completion on the stats screen
Serpent Samaritan
Free 40 Bound Serpents
Serpent Spanker
Free 80 Bound Serpents
Serpent Savior
Free all 120 Bound Serpents
One Hit Wonder
Purchase 1 upgrade in the Motor Forge
Loyal Customer
Purchase all upgrades in the Motor Forge
Virtuoso
Learn all guitar solos
Tourist
View all vistas
Now You Must Tell the Tale
View all Legends
Voices From Beyond
Unlock all songs in the Mouth of Metal
Flowerslave
Summon all Motor Forges
Practice Bloody Practice
Win an AI stage battle - any difficulty
Victör
Win a ranked multiplayer match
Subjügator
Win 10 match-made multiplayer battles.
Cönquerer
Win 50 match-made multiplayer battles.
Master of the Flame
Double Team with every Ironheade unit
Master of the Tear
Double Team with every Drowning Doom unit
Master of the Blood
Double Team with every Tainted Coil unit
Armchair General
Win a single-player Stage Battle against the AI using only orders
Favored
Acquire 3,000 Fire Tributes
Sellout
Spend 250,000 fans - any mode
Some Demon Flesh on your Bumper
Slay 150 enemies with the Deuce - any mode
I've never touched an axe before
Personally smote 300 enemies - any mode
Silence, ground walker!
Gain 5 or more seconds of hang time in a single jump - any mode
Six Degrees of Schafer
Play with or against another player who has this Achievement
Ringleader
Trap 15 enemies in one ring of fire with the Fire Baron's Double Team
Painkiller
Kill 25 enemies with the grinder of one Rock Crusher
Dollpocalypse
Hit 6 enemies with the explosion from a Brood's Double Team
Euthanasia
Hit 15 enemies with one Agony Ball using the Pain Lifter's Double Team
Death From Above
Kill 20 enemies with one Bleeding Death
Coolest Thing Ever
Jump over a Hextadon in the Deuce
Beast Master
Ride one of every ridable animal.
Boar Bather
Ride a Razorfire Boar into the Sea of Black Tears and live to tell the tale.
Quill Tosser
Kill a Tollusk using only Ground Urchins
Groupie
Complete Campaign mode on Gentle
Roadie
Complete Campaign mode on Normal
Legend
Complete Campaign mode on Brütal
Iron Fist
Win an AI stage battle - Brütal difficulty
Carnivore
Run down 20 animals in the Deuce with the Coiling Maw equipped.
If You Want Blood, You Got It
Kill 20 Tainted Coil units with the Disgorger.
Cry Me a River
Kill 20 Drowning Doom units with the Eye of Sorrow.
Beard Beard Action Beard!
Make out with Ophelia while wearing the Mountain Man Threads.
A Face Like a Beast
Kill 15 enemies with a Metal Beast while wearing the Zaulia Threads.
Hammer of Infinite Fate Tourist
Play a multiplayer game on all Hammer of Infinite Fate multiplayer maps.
Hammer of Fate Champion
Win 10 games on Hammer of Infinite Fate maps - ranked or vs. the Brütal AI.
Whispering Rock
Chisel four Razputin heads onto Mt. Rockmore.
Norwegian Sendoff
Visit the grave of a fallen hero while wearing the Black Metal Threads.